The meaning of valentine’s day – It’s a day to celebrate love and supposedly an opportunity for us to reconnect. Love is the most amazing thing in our lives, whether you are with someone or not, nine times out of ten there is something in your life that you adore. Nothing else should matter, our bank balances, the size of our homes, what car you have- it puts all those things pale into insignificance when we face what makes us tick.
What is love?- There are so many things we can do on a daily basis to bring more love into our lives. The world seems to become a much happier place on valentines day. It makes us appreciate the little things that we often take for granted, the morning cuppa your partner makes you, the every day kiss you receive but on valentines day it means more. I’m pretty sure no-one has an answer for what is love? Everyone feels it in different ways and I can’t explain how it makes me feel (ironically, even though I’m writing this blog on Valentines day.)
Avoid the commercialism of Valentine’s day- Valentine’s day is not the highly commercialised chaos we see to the lead up of Valentine’s day. It’s much deeper than the meaningless tat we see in the shops, inflatables, balloons, a dozen red roses which the prices are hugely increased. Its much more than the candle lit dinners and fancy chocolates which taste like shit. It seems we are all obsessed with validating our love on this one day to our partners, as if it just takes one day to prove you love someone. I do however find it funny when I see people rushing around the shops to somehow prove their love for that someone special and they think that roses and chocolates are the answer. The commercialism has gone so far that some people are made to feel inadequate if they are single on Valentine’s day.
Be romantic on the cheap- People seem to have this crazy concept that you need to break the bank to be romantic. I actually find that something homemade speaks a thousand words and means more than roses or chocolates. Homemade food and staying in with a film or even a takeaway, means more to me than some fancy restaurant where I can’t pronounce half the crap on the menu and the portion sizes are ridiculous, by the time I get home I’ll be hungry again.
Love your life and yourself- I find the key to a good relationship is having a healthy image of yourself and to love yourself again in a healthy way. The minute you are negative it will bring the other person down. Your partner thinks you are the most amazing person in the world, who are you to say otherwise? Believe them, after all they are with you and want to be with you. One of the most important relationships you will have is that relationship with yourself.
Single life- Just because you are single doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy this day too. Go out, there are other singletons out there, you just need to find them. They are probably all thinking the same, but why should you suffer? Don’t treat this one, over hyped day any differently to the rest. Don’t dwell on the past and the previous break up’s and heartache, it’s time to move on. Life is too short.
Make your relationship the best- Communication and listening is essential to make a relationship amazing. Of course all relationships will have their up’s and down’s but we are human and its completely normal. Remember that you somehow attracted this person to you, continue to be yourself. Keep the relationship fun! I can’t stress this enough. Fun is key, no matter how hectic your life is always make time for fun. My partner and I hadn’t been ice skating since we were kids, we decided to go ice skating and we both loved it. Doing something we used to do when we were kids bought the fun back into our relationship.
Prepare for the future- One day you will probably end up getting married, prepare yourself for that, then of course children ( I have done it the other way round, although nine years later I’m still engaged!) Children put a lot of strain onto a relationship, but you have to remember that before they came along, it was just the two you, wrapped up in love and being child like, you can still act this way when you are a parent. Being a parent shouldn’t make your love for each other any less, it just takes work. Marriage or any relationship takes work, no matter how long you have been in your relationship continue to work at it every day, make the effort and you will have that future.
What we have to remember is romance may bring you together in the early days, but it is the tiny day to day acts of love and kindness which allow our relationships to blossom, not just this one day of media frenzy. Take this Valentine’s day as a day to start focusing on blossom your relationships, doing the day to day acts of love every day.